Help Yourself to Whatever You Want Betsy Smith, PhD, ACC
Help yourself to whatever you want is a gracious southern phrase that communicates to guests in a home that they are welcome. In this article, help yourself to whatever you want, has a different connotation, and that is to get what you want - you have to help yourself.
You know the feeling, the sweaty palms, the knot in the pit of your stomach, the hair at the back of your neck standing on end. This is the feeling that many women experience when they consider reentering the workforce. This feeling of anxiety increases when they take that first step of reaching out to someone or some agency to assist them in this quest. When an interview opportunity appears, the adrenaline really starts pumping.
Here are three sure-fire strategies to help yourself to what ever you want.
1. Invest in yourself
An excellent way to prepare for reentering the work world is to invest in training and personal/professional development. Too often women tell me “I can’t afford training”, or “I would be too intimated to go to a professional development workshop.” To which I reply, “You can’t afford not to go to professional development training.” Let’s face it, if you’ve been out of the work force for more than a year, technology has changed, and you want to be up-to-date on those changes. Remember that the other participants are registered because they don’t know the subject – if they did, they would be teaching the class, not taking the class. You will rapidly increase your skills and gain a competitive edge in the job market by participating in workshops, seminars, or classes. There are inexpensive ways to get professional development. Contact your local community college about classes or explore online opportunities. You are worth the investment and I guarantee you will get a large return on investment.
Investing in your self-image is an important aspect of getting the job you want. A professional image is critical to success and that often requires the investment in new clothes. Yes, the word is investment. Think of your purchase of new clothes as an investment in your future success. Be creative in your approach to shopping for these new outfits. Shop the resale boutiques; scour the sale papers religiously, look for dress for success workshops to learn how to make the most of your investment in your professional wardrobe. If you want to help yourself to a job with a good salary, you must first invest in your self-image.
Practice self-care so that you can be productive at work and happy at home. Self care in is imperative to a successful launch into the business world. Think of your self as the hub of a wheel. If the hub isn’t well oiled and working smoothly, the wheel can’t turn effectively. By helping yourself to the elements of well being - exercise, good nutrition, adequate sleep, massage, fun, and learning new things – you will be healthy and focused on getting what you want.
2. Get rid of the gremlins
Gremlins are the obstacles to success. Gremlins may be people, beliefs, circumstances, stress, poor time management or fears. The first step in getting rid of your gremlins is to identify them. What is in your way? What is stopping you from going forward with your plans and dreams? What does that gremlin look like? Here is a strategy for identifying your gremlins. Make a list with three columns:
Name your gremlin in the first column; write your solution in the middle column and give your desired result in the third column. If you don’t know a solution brainstorm with a friend, colleague or life coach – or make one up. Sometimes the most creative solutions come from the most outlandish ideas. Take action to overcome obstacles. Describe your desired results in detail. Make a picture of that result. Know how it will look and feel when you reach that result. Your success in this task is preparation for your future successes.
3. Play to your strengths
Do you know your strengths? When you are utilizing your strengths, you feel as though you could work on a project forever. You may become physically tired, yet you feel energized because you are enjoying what you do. When you are working in your strength area, you think, “I would do this if no one paid me.” Doesn’t it make sense to find a job that fits your strengths instead of working at a job that is unfulfilling and drains your energy?
There are many tools to help you discover your strengths. Two of my favorites are Strengthsfinder 2.0, by Tom Rath, which can be found at any bookstore or online for about $15.00. Inside the cover of the book is a code that gives you access to an online assessment. The assessment is quick, easy, and very informative. Dr. Martin Seligman at the University of Pennsylvania has a free strengths assessment (Brief Strengths Test) at www.authentichappiness.com. This assessment is also quick, easy and informative.
When you are clear about your strengths, opportunities will present themselves that you would not have seen before. You will notice jobs that require your specific strengths, and when you interview, it will be obvious that your strengths are perfect for the right position.
Summary
Here’s the good news about helping yourself to whatever you want. You have everything you need to be successful inside you right now. Listen to your inner voice because that is your soul talking to you. Invest in your self to improve your professional skills, your work life balance and your image. Practice self-care so that you can be productive at work and happy at home. Identify your strengths and put them to work where you will flourish. Help yourself – to whatever you want.
About the Author:
Elizabeth L. "Betsy" Smith, PhD, ACC is a certified Executive Leadership Coach, who coaches leaders and their teams to move, with strategic boldness, themselves and their organizations from average to excellence. Betsy is also a coach with the Shift Change Coaching Group. This Group specializes in coaching nurses to make healthy proactive choices and to focus on quality self-care to promote high quality nursing care and sustain a successful student experience and a long fulfilling nurusing career. To learn more about Betsy's work visit her at www.shiftchangecoaching.com and www.boldchange.com.